reserv·ātiō /15

I am getting closer to the middle of this exercise, following Xavier De Maistre's A Journey around My Room where I have decided like him to take "42 days off" and drive to my usual reservoirs and to write about it. Yesterday's walk was different because halfway through it, after having hugged trees, sung to them a little, and offered seeds from my apple I continued my walk in the company of two dogs and their owner. Do I look at nature in a different way? Do I look at it at all? I think I have enjoyed both ways of walking: a brisk one while talking and not being alone; but I also like my solitary-nose-in-the-air slow walk.

We met at EliðiRr's place.

While getting there, I noticed how colours changed when compared to 15 posts prior. The smell also hit me. It took me back home. And I realised that when asked, later, where "home" is I defined myself as Mittle-European. Because this is, at heart, who I really am: an antevasín, an in-betweener, someone who likes liminal spaces. At home alone and in company; a bit of this and a bit of that. Shallow and deep. A comforter and needing a hug. A knotted system of various languages which I use to express whatever I am feeling at the moment. Someone told me to always find the time for what my heart wants and probably the meaning of it all is - in the words of Marcus Aurelius, MED 8.1 - "doing what human nature demands" [found on HERE].

But I also remembered the old ways of men of valleys and woods who remembered the importance of women as Keepers of the Land; recognising their power and acknowledging their wisdom. And that acknowledgement was mutual. There was an understanding and meeting-in-the-middle which was followed by "what human nature demands". There were roles and respect for their definitions and boundaries. And trust followed that.

There were whispers brought by the winds, of stories of old; damp caves which offered lessons; stags who blinded you and as Óðinn, you walked the land grounded in what you learned from the soles of your feet. Animals led your way. We could read bark and see things with all of our senses. Then sbilfs, dragons, fairies, little people, kelpies, lights, wells and any pool of water were alive with stories and ancestral wisdom. Somehow, we knew. Somehow, my wrists as aerials understood that what flew within me was of the same nature as what flows outside, the same nature of wind, fire, water and earth. When I walk around my reservoir, I am reminded of all that. I am back there, back then, back home.

In my dream, last night, I was back there. Sitting in the hidden garden of that house that always sees me happy. Sipping a coffee, next to my Mother, I let myself miss my return flight. My inner gyroscope knows what I need and I know that while here, bodies of water and tall trees, small mushrooms and ferns and a sleepy dragon will always "bring me home". As a Benandante my purpose is always to ensure a good crop and to protect the land, travelling in my sleep to learn lessons I would otherwise miss, initiated in my infancy into the mysteries by my Father, who as a Rebis Apollo took the name of Diana and introduced me to Artemis, my Guardian. In my journeys, I followed a white hart who freed me of my left eye, travelled a large rolling river upstream led by a smiley native, walked towards three palm trees as sister φοῖνιξ, and was celebrated as a Shakti Aphrodite while being offered beads on a cushion. I asked EliðiRr yesterday, my forehead against his spine, what my gift is. Now I know: I can travel and capture messages from the otherworld. That is my spiritual quest: connect, unite, meet in the liminal.

Where water turns into sand

where leaves meet air

and where roots embrace soil.

There, is where you will find me.

onwards + upwards > out + about

mx

________________________

Date : 19 OCT 2023

Duration : 01:18:39 3.53 km

Steps: 4,580

Location : Turton and Entwistle Reservoir

Weather : warmer and covered

T : 14°